Hi, I’m Linda, and I’m an accidental homeschooler. I’m the mother of a 9 year old daughter, who is not quite half way through fifth grade. Homeschooling was never part of the plan. Sometimes plans change. Kindergarten, day one: My impulsive, bright, hyperactive, and opinionated daughter decided public school was for babies. She came home and told me that they still took naps and asked “What’s up with that? I thought I was going there to learn, you lied to me.” I thought I had until her teenage years to be accused of lying. Apparently, I was mistaken. Kindergarten was a repeat of what we had already learned at home. (Wait, were we already homeschoolers and just didn’t know it yet?) Did I mention that she hated repeating stuff? My sweet preschooler had become an incredibly difficult kindergartener overnight. Kindergarten, day 180: The kindergarten teacher should be canonized. We had finally gotten my daughter to agree to working quietly in class, with the promise that first grade was going to get a lot more interesting. Because she was engaged, we continued with first grade work over that summer between K and 1st grade. I still haven’t decided if that was excellant planning, or incredibly poor planning. First Grade, day 10: We had already covered this work in the summer, which meant everything was a repeat. I did mention that she hated repeating stuff, right? First Grade: day 30: She refused to do much of what they asked her to do. Nothing would sway her from her refusal. They started attaching labels to her like “oppositional” and “defiant”. From a parent’s perspective and a teacher’s perspective she was a nightmare incarnate. When you look at it from a six year old point of view, I have to admit that it makes perfect sense.1. It is not fair. If I work really hard, and finish my work they make me do early finisher work. That’s the same stuff I just did and they try to make me to do it again. I’m not doing that, Mama.2. What is the point of busy work? If the teacher doesn’t grade it, it’s worth nothing. If it is worth nothing, then why waste my time? Give me something worth doing.3. They must think I’m the stupidest kid on the planet. Really. How many times do I have to repeat the same spelling words? Every day for a whole week? Why can’t they just test me on Monday? If they think I’m stupid, then I think they are stupid. See how fast this was unraveling? Her mouth and her attitude kept her in trouble, her self-esteem dropped into the negative. Trust me when I tell you that you never want to hear your six year old say, “I’m so stupid I don’t deserve to live, you should just kill me.” I never want to hear that again. I spent many days up at the school, talking to the teacher, the behavioralist, the principal. At home, we fought, screamed, threatened, begged, pleaded, bribed, and punished. I mentioned she’s opinionated, right? Our family was in chaos and self destructing. That is not an exaggeration. Three things finally forced my hand to try homeschooling. First, the school said that the only choice was to suspend her, or paddle her, for her refusal to participate in class “like the other students”. She was 6, principal was a 6 feet tall man, going to come at her with a 2 foot paddle. I’m thinking…NO! Second, the school assured me that she was too immature to go on to second grade, so they were probably going to hold her back. See my above statements regarding her love of repeating things. This choice piece of news came about October. They gave up on her… in October…of first grade. Third, well, let me set this one up for you. She was out sick the week before Thanksgiving break. I went to the school on Friday to pick up her entire week of missed school work. I expected workbook pages, reading assignments, maybe a test to give her, you know, school work. I picked up twenty pages. Of those 20 pages, 12 pages were pilgrim parts to color: arms, legs, body, and head, of both a boy pilgrim and a girl pilgrim. There were two pages of Native Americans to color. One page of turkey body, and a page of turkey feathers, feet, and beak, to color and assemble. Sixteen pages of coloring work. For this they were willing to suspend, paddle, and hold back my strong willed child. I’m not in denial. She is, at times, quite difficult to deal with. She is also bright, and hungry to learn.
Public school was not working. Private school would have been the same song, much more expensive verse. I spent Thanksgiving week near hysterics because I realized I was going to have do something. Like a person starved, she spent the week voraciously consuming lessons from second grade Time4Learning. By the end of the week I realized that this engaged child was the one I knew and loved, the one I wanted back. It hasn’t all been a bed of roses, she is still strong willed and opinionated. I have no doubt, our lives are much better because we became accidental homeschoolers.
